Four Things Not To Tell a Sick Person –Or Write in a Get Well Soon Card

Being sick makes a person the center of attention; and this happens to be the only good thing about it. At such times, even those who may have disappeared for ages will suddenly show up and want to be by your side –it’s just great! Unfortunately, in most cases, these are the same people who will end up telling you insensitive things, or giving you cards with not very thoughtful messages. Given that, here are the five things I believe no sick person would want to hear. 

You can beat this!

The last time I was in hospital, an old friend brought me some cards, flowers and a whole basket of fresh fruit. While I appreciated that, I was a taken aback when from out of the blue, she blurted ‘if there’s anyone who can beat this illness, it’s you’’. Then, I thought to myself, no one fights with a disease; you just get unlucky and are forced to deal with it. If medical science doesn’t work for you therefore, it doesn’t mean you lost because there was no battle in the first place.

I really need to see you

You might have a very busy life that you may even find it hard to create time to see a sick friend. Still, you don’t have to tell them about that. Just make an effort and stop by some day after work, or after you are done running your errands. If you can’t, then don’t talk to them about how you couldn’t get time off, it’s just wrong!

You look horrible!

Okay, this is not something that any sane person would say but still, there are those who simply can’t stop themselves. When a person is sick, they want to hear hopeful, encouraging, and helpful messages. So, if you are visiting someone and you get the urge to tell them that they have gained excess weight and that they should work on it’s as soon as they recover, its best that you just leave them that card and mound of snacks that you brought and walk out.

Is there something I can do to help?

This is a phrase that most of us love to use and even though you may really mean it, it’s absolutely cliché. Because of that, someone may assume that you are just saying it for the sake. To get around this, a better idea would be to point out something specific and volunteer to do it. For example, if the person has kids who need to be picked from school, you could ask to handle the task for a day or two. Don’t make things harder for them by trying to drive them into thinking up a duty for you.

Other than these, there are also those people who may try to argue with you about how dialysis or chemotherapy feels like just because they read it someplace on the internet, or in a magazine. Some may even go ahead and tell you how lucky you are to have survived. Regardless of that, as a patient, the most important thing for you to do is to stay positive; and if you have ever told someone any of these things, you shouldn’t stress about it either. It could be that you didn’t know what to say and felt that you were doing your best at the time, or maybe you believed that what you said or wrote in that card was actually nice. Still, the good thing is that, as long as they have that delicious cake, beautiful cards, and fresh flowers, on their side, most people will not dwell on something wrong they think you may or may have not said.